This past Sunday my pastor preached a sermon on Genesis 2:18-25 on how marriage should be, using the example of Adam and Eve, the first marriage. He talked about that humans are incomplete without relationships, and marriage is the deepest and strongest of all relationships. A quote by Michael Williams, a theology professor at Covenant Seminary, summarizes this, " God intends that we be social creatures...". The Biblical reason for marriage is to have companions along the journey and co-laborers in the gospel. This principle also applies to platonic relationships. True Christian relationships are built on community and self-sacrifice, not a pragmatic "what can I get out of it" mentality.
OK, nice sermonette, you're probably saying. But because God created humans in his image, they can create works of art, including fantasy fiction that bear his stamp even if the book/TV show/movie isn't written for a "religious" reason. The book
Exile by R.A. Salvatore, TV show
Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and film trilogy
Lord of the Rings show the good of self-sacrificing relationships like in Genesis 2.
Drizzt Do'Urden is the protagonist of R.A. Salvatore's
Dark Elf trilogy written in the early 1990s. It is set in the Forgotten Realms, which is a popular Dungeon and Dragons campaign setting. Drizzt is a dark elf who is trained to be a powerful warrior for his clan Do'Urden, which is dedicated to becoming the most powerful clan no matter the cost and observes pagan rites, like human sacrifice. However, Drizzt is taught by his mentor Zaknafein to respect life and not slaughter innocent creatures, like light elves or deep gnomes. He leaves the house of Do'Urden after refusing to kill a light elf child and becomes an exile in the dark pits of the Underdark.
While in the Underdark, Drizzt battles within himself. He has two personalities: the hunter, a character that seeks only to survive in his dark environment. This personality allows him to subsist in the Underdark and defeat monsters like a basilisk. The other personality is Drizzt, a creature of conscience and character who wants to live a moral life. The creature of conscience overcomes when Drizzt surrenders to the deep gnomes. However, he's spared from execution by Belwar, who Drizzt let live after a dark elf raid.
Belwar lost his hands in that battle, but the deep gnome reaction to this shows the self-sacrificial nature of their society. Instead of casting him out like a beggar, the gnomes build Belwar two special hands: one shaped like a hammer and one like a battleaxe. This allows Belwar to continue in his role as miner and fighter. Drizzt falls in love with the companionship and selflessness of the gnome society. He even reenacts his battle with the basilisk for the young gnomes and goes on patrol with the gnomes when an evil dark elf is spotted... The dark elves' "friendship is born out of mutual profit" whereas the gnomes' relationship are "based on the strengths of community" and are great examples for Christian community.
Another example of self-sacrifice is found in the famous cult TV show
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1997-2003). Buffy Summers is appointed the Slayer, a young girl whose task is to defend the world from vampires and other supernatural entities. She lives in Sunnydale, CA as a normal high school student and is helped by Rupert Giles, the Watcher, whose job is to help and protect the Slayer.
But before Buffy, there were other slayers. Spike, a violent vampire with a heart of gold, has killed two slayers in the past century and arrives in Sunnydale during the second season episode "School Hard" ready to find and kill the new Slayer. He has easily defeated the previous Slayers because they worked alone. However, Buffy has friends who support her despite her dangerous lifestyle.
For example, in the season one finale, Buffy's friends Xander Harris (the school loser/goofball/virgin) and Angel (a 241 year old "good" vampire that struggles with his blood lust) revive her when the Master (vampire leader) kills her. Xander and Angel both have feelings for Bufffy, and Xander makes many jokes at Angel's expense. Also, while walking in the graveyard, Angel tells Buffy that he is jealous that Xander gets to be with her during the day because he's human. However, when Buffy flatlines, Angel fights off the vampires while Xander does mouth to mouth CPR to revive her. (What movie does this remind you of?) To fight evil, Xander and Angel put aside their problems to protect Buffy even though Angel is a vampire and Xander is on the bottom of the totem pole in popularity.
Buffy's other "companions" include Willow Rosenberg (the school nerd and computer whiz) and Cordelia Chase (popular, rich cheerleader). Many students take advantage of Willow as a tutor in their classes, and she humbly helps them. Willow's only friend is the goofball Xander, renowned for his horrendous pickup lines. Instead of shunning Willow, Buffy befriends her even though it means she moves down the "social ladder." Buffy trusts Willow and relies on her computer abilities to help research "mysterious deaths." Cordelia is the most popular girl in school, but she feels like she's alone in a crowd. But after Buffy, Xander, and Willow save her life from vampires, she joins their group even joining them at the graveyard after cheerleader camp and making stakes for Buffy. Throughout the series, Cordelia understands that to be a true friend, one can't expect anything in return, and she hangs out with Buffy, Xander, and Willow even though they are unpopular. The vampire Spike sums up the value of self-sacrificing companionship with this one-liner, " A slayer with friends and family. That as sure as hell wasn't on the brochure." Buffy succeeds where other Slayers have failed because she has a close community of friends and mentors to help her fight evil.
A final example of self-sacrificing friendship is Gandalf the Grey in
Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring. Gandalf is a Maia (basically an angel), has an Elf ring, and is one of the most powerful wizards in Middle Earth. But he decides to allow Frodo Baggins, a small, weak hobbit, wield the One Ring. He gives Frodo guidance and urges him to not go alone but pick trustworthy companions. In the book, he recommends Aragorn, who is Frodo's guide to Rivendell and defends him from the Black Riders.
But in the Mines of Moria he gives the greatest gift any true friend can give: his life. Gandalf alone holds off the Balrog, so that the Fellowship (including Frodo) can escape and continue in their quest to destroy the Ring. He breaks the bridge underneath to defeat the Balrog and falls into the abyss. Even though Frodo is much weaker than him, Gandalf befriends him, instructs him, and sacrifices his own life for Frodo. This is true
agape love, and Gandalf can be seen as a Christ figure, sacrificing himself for the salvation of the many and rising again stronger and more powerful (Gandalf the White).
"We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren." 1 John 3:16 (NASB)
